Heads down Bums Up.

ROFL.

I do so suggest you all sit down grab a coffee and get ready for a mammoth Peta post - I know you're all asking 'are there any other kind?' - but trust me this one's bigger then Ben Huir!

Firstly. I have been on a bit of a revamp kick of late. Not only did I update my blog - but the Wana be a Digi Star blog as well! Sadly the revamp hasn't drawn in ANY new emails for people wanting to be on the blog - My inbox is empty!! - But still I'm not ready to give up on this idea just yet!! You know it's a pity I have to wait on other people for this at times. Haha!

Anyways [whoops there is that word again] I also even made a blinkie for the blog!! So proud of myself as I have never been able to get the hang of Image ready. It scared me. So I would always just use Jasc Animation 3 to do them as I knew how to use that. But yay I finally have worked out Image Ready andI think I can do a lot more in there then I could with JA3

So here is the blinkie - feel free to save it and use it LOL - I want to see them all over the digiverse thanks very much [yeah I know - dreaming]



Then I still have to do some 'tweaking' of this blog there is a few changes I wish to make - nothing drastic but I would also love three columns on here as I have done with WDSB [don't you just love the digi world and it's nature of making every site into a acronyms!]. Just so I can put in stuff for the whole "I'm a designer now" thing. - Feel even more like a designer now as I'm up on Jen Stranger's Designer List [under Peta Stokes] and also have kit previews in the gallery at Promotions 4 digital Scrappers.

Today with my creative brain ticking over I got thinking on the idea of a revamp for Digital Scrapbooking Down Under. I want a new banner for it and have come up with a GREAT idea. I also think it's about time I made a blinkie or two for there and maybe was a little more active in promoting it. Would be awesome to have a great list of aussie Designers on there for one thing! Also on this list is another project I have been talking about with a few people, have the green light from Shannon over at DST - so now its just up to me to get the ball in motion! I had yet another great idea for a Aussie focused site -but really don't know if it's 'worth' investing in, so saving that away for later. Did I mention that my creative brain has been ticking over?

I read something interesting in a aussie scrapmag today -[SM for those who are Aussie] - about a survey or they had done and it said that 21% of people surveyed had tried digital scrapbooking. Of course there was no list to say what % of that 21% have taken on digi scrapping full time/part-time etc...... But it also got me wondering. I know I never filled in their survey. I wonder how many of the Aussie digi girls I know did? I think it could be fair to say that if they had of that number might have been a lot higher.

Now back to being creative. My Team are cracking the wip at me to get a new kit for them. I have to laugh about this. Isn't it normally the Designer running after her Dt to get them to do layouts? - I have mentioned haven't I that I have the best creative team?! I think though they will be happy to know that they soon will have something to play with. - Not so much new but a revamp [there is that word again] of an old past 'free' kit.

I really do love engaging in creative pursuits. Today has just given me renewed determination to get stuck into my studies. Just hope that feeling is still there when I wake up tomorrow and have to get to work!! Which brings me to a new point. I am - as the title says - Heads down bums up this week with study. It MUST be done - It HAS to be done and their WILL NOT be any more slacking off [waves finger at self]. Mainly because I am really pleased with what I have done here and over at WDSB - I love designing and creating. I WANT that to be my 'future' - so no more screwing around.

So yes. Lots of big and little things keeping me busy this week. .... But there is something even BIGGER......

As of last Saturday I became a passport carrying member of Weight Watchers. I went to my very first meeting. It feels like I'm going to AA or something ROFL! "Hi I'm Peta and I'm Fat. I have been fat for as long as I can remember. It has been two days since my last big mac!"

Why this sudden move you might ask. Well one, they had a free voucher, I saved $33 by not having to pay to join! YAY. Two, I'm just sick of being this unhealthy. I'm sick of not eating right and sick of being addicted to bad stuff. I would like to actually have more structure and more motivation to eat better. My trouble is I don't like putting in the effort to eat. Hate working out what to eat, let alone cooking it!! So it's always been easier to a/ go out and be 'naughty' b/ have something quick and easy c/ just not have anything at all....

Why do I want to do this. Okay so yeah - I want to be a hot skinny chick in a bikini! I've NEVER worn a bikini! LOL. Yes I want to eat healthy. I think those are the normal reasons why anyone wants to do this right?! Well I want to be able to walk into a job interview when I finish tafe and feel as if the first impression I make isn't the one about how many fat rolls I have. I want to lose my self doubt!! I've always put to much self loathing into my size. It's time to stop that!! I also think that the whole not eating/eating crap is what messes with my head at times. Then reason WHY I'm not as focused on stuff as I should/could be. Lastly... Is a bit of a personal one and I'm hesitant to put this out there as you'll all think I've gone crazy! I want to be a mum! When Stacy and I where together before, I did get ot the stage [the day Kira was born] that my body clock sprung into life and everything was baby baby baby.... We talked about having our own family and about what I would go through in those nine months before even the baby got here. We actually made the pact that for the health of me and the supposed child, it would be better if I could lose some weight first. My whole foot thing plays a big part in this to. We set the bench mark at 20kg. I never really tried though. Because maybe I knew it wasn't 'right', or maybe I just didn't want it enough. I gave it a little shot but never really put my 'heart' into it.

But now. Times changed and my heart is there. :) and regardless of how things work out with Stacy and I in the future I want to do this now, before I think of becoming anyone's mum. This might be something I do with Stacy. This time next year who knows I could be giving him the news that he's going to be a Dad. That would be seriously cool and I know he's 'there' too. But I don't have a crystal ball to see.

So yes, those are my reasons :)

My goal is 38 kg!!

It's so going to be a big adjustment. Watching what I eat, planning out my meals and hell even going shopping for food stuff!! I'll have to cook more often... eat out less and even get more exercise!!

In the last 10ish years my weight has never really fluctuated and I have never really been all fixated on how much do I weigh this week. To start thinking already - "I hope next Saturday I don't weight the same as I do now" ... To even think that possible in 10 weeks time I could be 5kg lighter is strange....

but here I go. Putting my best foot forward ie my left foot cause my right foot is screwed ROFL ;)

So...... as they say - always finish on a song. But I'd actually rather finish on a layout.. so here you go... something that is quite a bit different from what you are use to seeing of me.

{credits: Dianne Rigdon's the gloaming kit at www.shabbyelements.com, tool box from Dani Mogstad at www.designbydani.com flowers from Ali Folendore at www.scrapbook.bytes.com }

I hope you all had a great weekend and thanks to anyone who read through all that waffle.