You would cry too if it happened to you...

damit now I have that song stuck in my head "It's my birthday and I'll cry if I want to, cry if I want to, you would cry too if it happened to you.."

Well guess what!?! I'm out on the 'house' computer. Guess Why!?! Once again my computer seems to have packed it's bags and left for greener pastures. Once again it will not turn on. This is instilling a lot of confidence in these power boards with these computers isn't it?? *sigh*

Today of all days!!! Why me??

I didn't want to post this as I was trying not to announce it till it was over and I could say I had a good day. Looks like there is no point in waiting becasue I don't think I'll be saying I had a good day now.

You see.... It's my birthday today.

This weekend while 'Okay' saw me go through some hellish emotions, you see, I went to see my family this weekend - the weekend before my birhtday and do you think there was any "what do you want to do for your birthdays?" Nope. Nothing. We didn't even do anything 'small' on friday night, we had yucky snags for dinner and just watched telly. Saturday was spent getting ready for an afternoon/tea dinner that my parents where doing as they where having friends over - which meant me hideing in the computer room/spare room scrapping and playing on the computer as didn't want to be the odd one out and after all they are my parents friends not mine - I left them to have fun LOL. It also meant me cooking my own dinner as they had fish and I don't eat seafood.

Sunday was okay, but also marked off as 'Kira's day' we drove to see her take part in her first gymnastic comp [she did okay got a second all up for the floor in her class group].

Saturday I got really angry as while we where out shopping I got mum to stop by the video store as I thought I'd get Harry Potter 4 out and watch it why they entertain their friends. Well mum said that I couldn't get it as they wouldn't have time to watch it. Pretty much resulted in me throwing a silient tanty and not getting anything to watch.

So I spent the weekend a might 'angry' and 'disapointed' because I didn't even get a *moment* to celbrate my birthday. Although I do have to mention that my sister gave me a birthday present. Clothes. Jeans that are hipsters and sit way to low that I'll never wear and a shirt that although I liked when I tried it on when out shopping with my sister and mother they both said it didn't look any good on me... but yes I liked it [but maybe not on me either]. I know her heart was in the right place. But MYGOSH she has brought me clothes so many times and never gotten it *right* you'd think she'd realise to just get me a dvd or something. When I mentioned that the jeans where to 'low' she said I should get a belt - belt wouldn't fix it - then her reply was that she didn't pay full price for them so if they didn't fit I could just throw them out as they didn't cost her all that much.... Yes but what about the cost to me??? That's my birthday present!! So my ONLY birthdy present [so far] is throw - away-able because it didn't cost much... *sigh*

I love my family but sometimes they can do the best job at makeing me feel insignificant. :(

So todays little effort of the computer not turning on ... really just puts iceing on the cake.

It's also sad because this will be the first birthday I'm 'away' from a large group of friends I use to have. I miss them. So dragging that back through my heart will make me cry again. I did hope not to think about it today but alas as I sit here and type my woes it's come out and added a few streaks to my face. [maybe even a few lines - I am getting older now you know - 28 ekk two years and I'll be thirty!] It's sad when friendships change. I know I won't hear from them at all becsaue after all I'm 100% postive I forgot all of their's last year to with everything that went on.

*sigh* I was looking forward to the two simple hours that will be spent between class and my lecture tonight at the pub as I thought then at least I'll be having a good time and can just have a tiny birhtday celebration.... but whats the beat that my new found friend will be away today and it will be me - on my own once again. Like always.