Sometimes it's hard being me
Okay totaly random. But sometimes I find it hard being "ME" Sometimes I wish that I could be someone else, I can't help but think how easier life would be sometimes if I could....
Lie to people, be more manipulative ie learn how to 'play' people to get what I want or play situtations to get what I want out of them . I have wished I wasn't so moral and have such a black and white attitude. I've always stood by the "if I wouldn't do it - then I wouldn't expect you to either" attitude, which and bite you on the backside becasue on the flip side of that is I kinde of forget just becasue I wouldn't do something doesn't mean others wont.... (this also comes under manipulative also)
I've also wished that I didn't have this need to be 'different' I hate doing things that fit a mold, or that are like everyone else. I think that was another reason I gave up digital scrpabooking, as not only did I get busy, but I felt like I stopped being "different" My stuff started to look like everyone else. I like to be invative, and I stop when I'm not being invative anymore. (when the rest of the world catches up to me haha)
Lately, I've been wishing I could buy into the 'suck up' games that I sometimes see people play - the I'll scratch your back if you scracth mine routine or even worse the "pissing' contests that some get into.
Sorry but I just can't bring myself to be nice to you just to get something out of you. It's not me. I don't do fake. Lately I've been feeling a lot of fakeness around me.
I'm having a bit of rant here.
It's sometimes hard, being open, honest and trusting - along with Stuborn, opinated and moral.
Some days. I wish I couldn't be me.
:)
feeling a little thin this week I think... (or a bit prickly)
3 comments:
You know what?
I love you for you. People who want you to play games, or lie to get you to do what they want, or the response they want, suck butt quite frankly. Those people are usually incredibly lonely and unhappy inside. So don't you let me here you say that EVER AGAIN!
Sometimes the grass isn't always greener. The people who matter love you for who you are. And you are speshul. :P
Spend less time thinking bout what everyone wants you to be, or trying to be what others aren't and just be yourself1! You'll be so much happier (can you tell I've been paying attention in counselling? LOL)
Love you honey chunks. Don't forget that (or I'll come beat you up)
That's never been you Peta. And sure, not being like that may have hurt in the past, but in the end you've come out much better and true to yourself.
Proud of who you are nowadays chook.
hehe you two are so cute!!
Thanks girls :) I do Like me. Just somedays I wish I could be a little bit different and little more able to play the game...
but - to honest and open for that LOL. I'll tell you want I think even if it means shooting myself in the foot! PMSL.
Hell at least you'll always know where you stand with me. Just really have to stop expecting people to be the same...
People suck sometimes.
but definately not you two ;)
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