a little less black and blue
okay a quick toothy update. I've been in bed all week with it. ARGH! I went to the dr's got medicated on Tuesday. On Wednesday I found out that one of the med's didn't agree [panadine ie the codeine] with me and I spent most of the day throwing up.
Side info. Did you know that vomiting can cause you to burst blood vessels?! I didn't. It kind of freaked me out when I looked in the bathroom mirror to find that my right eye lid was covered in some 'weird' red mark and I now looked like I had a black eye to go with my swollen face.
So I'm popping lightweight pain pills to keep the pain at bay while nursing my poor BROKEN jaw [yes - did you also know that to do teeth extractions they do have to break your jaw just a 'little' bit to get the tooth out - well I think she broke mine more then just a little bit]
Right now I might be supped up on pain meds [I'm sure there is enough in there floating around right now - I do rattle] but for the first time I can actually feel a small part of normality. Of course as soon as I move any part of my body, touch my face or breath then I'm totally reminded of the fact that my jaw kills. But hey it's an improvement. A few seconds of normalcy - hopefully tomorrow I can have a few minutes and by Monday next week I can have a few hours!
I've missed so much study time... I'm so far behind. Which would have been okay if I was a good little girl and on top of everything before hand - but you should all know me and know that that isn't even a remote possibility!
Okay enough of my pain. How about I get on with the next Queen of the Crop show off - seeing as there is only a few days left in that and I haven't shown off my 'last' layout for the comp yet...
Here it is - a very "Peta'ish" layout - black and bright colours. I had lots of fun with this. I used the journaling from and older layout just because when I read this challenge I thought of it straight away and couldn't shake it. It was very fitting. But of course I had to 'shake up' the layout a little and did a whole new layout for it.
take a good look a me, what do you see? Do you see someone happy someone funny and full of life, someone who has done wonderful things in her life. It's hard to put into words what I see when I look at me. I see what I want to be, all that I could be and everything I'm not. I see the lines and the marks I see the worry and the loss. I see the truth and the lie. Who I am isn't me at all. I'm a shadow of me, and I have been for a very long time. I am two different people sharing the one body. I am a mess. I'm hopeless and hopeful all at the same time. I don't learn. I don't stop. I don't change. I never forget or forgive. I hate myself and love who I am all at the same time. I dream of being different but yet always stay the same. I have achieved so much, yet I have achieved nothing. I loved and not really lived. I have seen but never really looked. I have listened but never really heard. I haven't tried, I've only pretended. I've stood alone. I've fallen and gotten back up. I've taken on the world and lived. I've hidden behind my fears and let things go by. I've given up. I've held on for all that I'm worth. I've battled and lost. I've battled and won. I've counted my blessings and been thankful for all that I have been given. I've taken advantage and been taken advantage of. I've loved and lost. I have been better off. I've laughed until I've cried. I've cried until I laughed. I've lied I've made people happy. I've changed lives. I've shared secrets. I've sung like there was no tomorrow. I've done things others never would. I've taken chances and lived to tell the tails. I've had fun. I've been sad. life has been good, life has been bad. It's had its moments that have tested and some of them I have failed. But tomorrow is another day and I'll try my best to get it right then. To do the things that have to be done
and as always.....
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