Okay update.

I have to let go of friends who didn't put up a fight when the shit hit the fan and let me fall. I love them and I forgive them for letting me down and I have to stop beating myself up for feeling angry at them for it. Sure it was a hard situation to be in. Sure I'm as much at fault. I'm sure I let them down also. But it hurt. No matter what the reasons the excuesses, the complications - IT HURT. And I have the right to feel that way. I've got to stop feeling guilty for it.

I have to stop the trying to understand what I did wrong's.

I have to stop the 'why do they comment over on x's blog and not on mine' things - this eat's me up inside and hurts - why should such people be important to me - and why should I want such people to care about me? But then I get tangled in guilt again - maybe it's my fault after all I did do this and this and what can I expect... acept it Peta - Move on.

I have to get a job / income. This would go a long long way to makeing things better. Only wish it was so easy for me. [long story]

I have to go do that Uni assignment.

I have to stop looking at the negatives and look at the postivies. Starting right now.

1. Fan Mail - I got a fan email via two pea's!! -How cool is that!
2. Jaime Warren wants to be president of the Peta fan culb [OMG]
3. I've made some great new cyber mates via the two peas pub board [crazy girls, Michelle, Caroline, Sarah and Ange]
4. I have fantastic blog girls around me - thank you all of you!!!
5. Karen made me cry - in a good way - love ya to hun and mis ya!!
6. I got chocolate today ;)
7. I got a new pillow today!! YAY better head support tonight in sleepy land.
8. It's Wednesday - which means tomorrow is thursday and I have date with the lovely Miz Suzy.
9. New photos of the girls - gosh they are cute!! hehe
10. I'm still here. I can make things better - it's all doable!!

Okay so enough of that - back to regular viewing ...

LAYOUT TIME

{credits: Fee Jardine's Cool Denim Baby Kit avaliable at www.scrapboxx.com.au }