3 Years Ago

yes - I hold onto things long past the time it is to let go. Old hurts and I never forgive those who hurt me because I don't let go. As one wise friend of mine once said [who I dearly miss- might go email her] 'I'm like a dog with a bone'. So anyways - part of my therapy has been to work out why I am/was holding onto certain person from my past... and it was interesting what came out of it. Ever since I've been getting better at putting it behind me to 'move on' and I did do that in a HUGE way last year [roflmao] ... I wish though it had of come about at a day that didn't have anything around it in the future to 'remind' me that the aniversary was coming - his birthday I can forget now, our other aniversarys I can forget [the going out, the first kiss the first i love you and the first well you know - I can tell you the dates now but when the days pased it wasn't like they jumped out at me and went HEY todays the day when.... but this one does. Becuase it happend after Leah's birthday. I'm not going to go into the story. It's not something I want to dive back into - I have even stoped myself mentaly going back to replay it all in my head... but I couldn't help to remember three years ago my life as I had known it feel apart when my first love broke my heart and my dreams for my future where changed with a few simple words....

Funny how things happen.

While I've struggled last year, and the issues of the past where always behind me pulling... I still woudln't go back to before then given the chance. Because this life can still give me much more then that one could ever had.

So yes I scrapped a page sort of like therapy to keep the thoughts at bay and just move on from here. So... there you go :)